Tough Love

Easter weekend my good friend Jaclyn came to visit. We've started our own little Easter tradition...the first year both traveling in to Boston for the weekend, last year I visited her on Cape Cod, and this year she came all the way from Providence, Rhode Island to visit me in Dayton, Ohio. It just so happened that that same weekend Liz was home from Graduate School, and my friend Brittany was celebrating her birthday. So, I was able to spend time with many of my good friends all at once. Here are some pictures of the weekend

At a park overlooking Cincinnati.
Liz and I sitting on the wall
Same picture with everyone else
Jac and I hiking in Yellow Springs

Celebrating Jaclyn's Birthday!

A few months ago, in the heart of Winter, I was planning a ski trip with some of my friends. Not a big trip, just a night of skiing at a local Mountain here in Ohio. Okay, okay, it wasn't exactly a "mountain" but you get the idea. Anyways, the more we talked about and planned the trip the less and less excited I became. And this isn't like me. Usually, I'm excited for everything. Literally, EVERYTHING. Plus I love skiing so I became frustrated at myself for not being excited which just made the vicious cycle worse. So I called my Dad. Mostly because he knows me so well and can tell it like it is to me. He listened to me complain about having to teach people to ski and how I wasn't going to get to even do any runs and how it wasn't going to be any fun and on and on and on. Then, he said to me: "So what? It's not about you, Ash, you're going to help your friends learn to ski. Go. And have fun." That was it, he had put me in my place and he was right, it wasn't about me. So, we went skiing and my friends learned to ski. I did have fun. And I even got to do a couple of good runs.

Sometimes tough love is all you need. Someone who knows you and isn't afraid to put you in your place so that you can recenter yourself and move forward. Someone who isn't afraid to tell you that it isn't about you, because, if we're honest with ourselves, most of the time, it isn't. I've skied down a mountain hundreds of times. But never with those friends on that mountain. My Dad helped me realize that it was more about being there, for my friends, being in the moment having fun and not getting so worked up about myself. And he helped me to remember that I want to live a life that isn't always about me. He showed me that tough love is always necessary.

In my short life, I've already been given some of the best friends anyone could ask for. Friends who aren't afraid of tough love. Who tell me like it is and put me in my place when I need it. Friends that, like my Dad, help me to remember the person that I want to be. And even more than that, they are friends that I can laugh with, who aren't afraid of adventures, and who constantly inspire me to see more and do more and experience more. They inspire me to be better, everyday.

I appreciate tough love. Even when its hard and I don't want to hear it. I needed to be reminded this Winter that a night of skiing wasn't about me, it was about my friends and it was about making memories and having new experiences together. And I need to remind myself often that I want to live a life that isn't about me, it's about serving and helping others.